2002-02-10 - 11:22 a.m.
So I got a funny story for all you little fuckers. I wasn't planning on updating again for a few days cause the song in the last entry is really cool, but this story is too good to pass up.
Statewide Auditions were yesterday.
I got a callback. The Climb Theatre asked for my credentials (resume) and said they'd give me a call.
All good so far? Good.
What is the Climb Theatre?
It's a touring company based in Minnesota. They do tours of schools to perform plays for grades K-12.
What kind of plays?
Ready to laugh your ass off?
The Climb Theatre performs educational plays for students about sensitive topics important to a child's growth.
Like what?
This is the funny part. Remember that they want to hire ME.
Play topics include- harassment, body image, diversity, and SUBSTANCE ABUSE!
Can't you just see me, up on stage, telling kids not to drink or do drugs?
Not to turn into alcoholics?
That pot is bad for them?
It's just what I've always dreamed of!!!
So does that mean you'll say no if they offer you the job?
HELL NO!!!
See, artistic integrity is for artists who are established enough to say "No" to any given job. For artists who don't have people from Third World countries trying to give them handouts. "We thought we had it bad. Here, take this piece of bread."
Your average beginning actor, however, does not have that privelege. No matter how much you may not want to do a given job, if there's one cardinal rule for young actors, it is that you never,
EVER
say "NO" to a job.
Ever.
There is no acting part out there that you are too good for, or that would conflict you.
You say "Yes, thank you," come in, do your job, take your check and your Equity points and go home and remind yourself that at least you're working and that there at least 1000 other actors out there right now who would put a nail through their own eyeballs to get the job you have right now.
And all of them probably drink and do drugs too.
Besides, Climb isn't a bad place to start. During the tour, you make $400 a week, plus you are provided food and housing, you get Equity points (Equity is the actor's union, and interestingly enough, the only way to get in is to accumulate a great enough body of professional work.)
You get a tour completion bonus, and possible college credit.
It's actually one of the better starting jobs you could ask for in the theatre.
I'll know in a few weeks. If they offer, be sure to look for me this summer at a high school near you.
"Kids, Marijuana is bad for you, and you should never ever try it."
Maybe I can just play the guy with the substance abuse problem all the time.
Don't drink or do drugs, kids. You'll turn into Ken.
Hey, that's an effective message. Don't worry. Tomorrow I'll have quotes from the Madison Crusade. What a time we had.
Ken
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