2006-01-07 - 8:41 p.m.
A freakin' horde of bikers came in for tours yesterday. Some Madison based biker gang arranged for some of them to take their holy pilgrimage to their almighthy shrine of harley. And by biker gang, I mean an actual honest to god friggin' biker GANG. Not a motorcycle enthusiasts club. These guys (and girls) showed up in leather, chains, and, most importantly, COLORS. They showed up with 60 of them, rowdy, some drinking in the parking lot as soon as they got off the bus. They were loud, obnoxious, gave security a lot of crap about the fact that some of them weren't wearing proper footwear and didn't have proper ID to take the tour, and were generally a hell of a lot of fun to hang out with. What they lacked in genteel charm and social grace they made up for with an easygoing attitude )toward me at least, since i was never an object of annoyance to them) and a wicked sense of humor.
I was given the enviable task of collecting contraband from them for storage. harley has strict rules that no cameras, camera phones, or pocket knives are allowed on the tour route. The first 2 i could understand immediately. The powertrain operations facility is right next to the super duper top secret development lab where the new bikes are designed, and that place has serious security with multiple levels of clearances and all that crap. So in the interest of defending against industrial espionage, I can see how all photograph taking devices are off limits. The knives part i never really got, specifically, as far as what harm you could really do with a pocket knife on the tour route.
Now, however, I do know why- volume. From 60 bikers, I collected about 3 dozen fairly good sized pocket knives, and a full several inch bladed Bowie knife, and that was BEFORE these guys went through the metal detectors. And that wasn't all I collected.
Biker- What are you gonna do with our stuff?
Me- I'm gonna put it in a locker, and give the key to your leader Dan over there.
Biker- Shit, you're gonna give it to Dan. he'll never give it back. *Chuckles* So, whatever we give you, you'll just hand back after the tour, right? no questions asked?
Me- Look, I ain't the cops, and I ain't security and I don't really care. I'm just saying security will take this stuff away from you at the metal detector anyway, so save time and hand it over now so we can get you started.
He then proceeded to drop a fistfull of bullets into my hand. I didn't pay attention to what kind they were, but they were rather big. From what i overheard, he had the foresight to leave the gun on the bus, but wanted the bullets with him as a good luck charm or something.
Other tour guide- Who here rides a harley?
All hands in the group but one go up.
Other tour guide- What do you ride?
Biker, sheepishly- A Honda.
Other Biker- Yeah, he rides a stupid Jap bike.
Me- I'm surprised they let you into the gang with one of those.
Other Other Biker- We're hoping this trip'll make him decide to get a man's bike.
Me- well, in the meantime, we've got a dumpster out back he can park the rice-burner in.
Hearty gut laughs from several large men. Like I said, a good sense of humor. I think they liked me. Especially since I gave their ammunition back, no questions asked.
Ken
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