2005-09-03 - 12:41 a.m.
So I'm just sitting here ripping my entire Bill Hicks collection into my MP3 player, and since it's a metric assload, I've got time to jot down an update.
Torii's wedding was a success. Except for that part where he forgot his shoes. That was awkward, but luckily Paul was there to save the day. I realized that the position of usher is far more important that mere groomsman, with the exception of the best man. All the rest of the guys have to do is stand there and look pretty, and in some circumstances, not grimace at escorting some fugly bridesmaid down the aisle (luckily, all of gloria's bridesmaids were cute.) The ushers are the real men of the hour, doing the work of several men, up to, and in my case, including, looking at least as pretty as any of the groomsmen (and in most cases, prettier. Please, it's me, and then it's me in a tux. You do the math.) If i ever get married, and my family doesn't force me to elope, my best man will be Wej (so i get a good bachelor party and a good toast) and then, moving down the ladder of people I love, my ushers will be the guys I'm closest to, with my groomsmen just being random guys who aren't as good looking as I am (so I stand out better) I'm pretty sure this is how women choose bridesmaids and their dresses.
Source who shall remain anonymous- "So...I heard a rumor that your absence from faire isn't of your own volition, and you aren't welcome back. Is that true?"
Well, I don't think so, but if it is, it's news to me. That one kinda caught me by surprise. I've had other things I've had to do, like ush the hell out of a wedding. And this weekend, I gotta get ready to leave town again. I dunno. I love the people in the group (most of them) but I've come to realize that faire in general is a massive professional failing for me, in part because it's not really the outlet I want as an actor, and everyone knows it, but largely due to the fact that...well...I really, really suck at it.
No, seriously. I am one of the worst historical re-enactors ever. I can improvise, and make one-liners, and my dialect is passable, but I know fuck all about the history, since it's never been something i was overly interested in. As a result, I can't carry on a normal conversation "in character" because I just don't have enough of a vocabulary. So...I can't...tell stories, make decent jokes, or interact with anyone without breaking character or doing something "out of period". Our new site doesn't help any, either, as I'm apparently the only person in the group who hasn't been able to adapt to it very well. And my elbows are hurt, so pike is hard, and my allergies don't like being near all the dust the jousting kicks up, which sucks. Every time I'm there I feel ashamed of myself for being not as good as everyone else, and I get frustrated, which doesn't help my attitude any. And I think we all know how I get when I'm frustrated.
"You're very good at what you do." That's what several of them have told me over the last couple years. "At what you do." "You're good at something, but it sure as hell isn't this."
I really wanted this year to be as much fun as last hell year. By the end of last year,I was really thinking that despite it all, maybe faire was something for me that I could really get into. Now I'm not so sure if it is, or if it woudl even be a good idea to try going back next year. The sad part is that so many of the friends I've made down there just don't have time or room in their lives for anyone who's not a faire person. I could feel that i was drifting away from some of them very early on. It's sad, but quirky, like a hyperaccelerated version of one of those relationships that you really want to have work out, but inevitably ends with "I love you, but I'm not IN LOVE with you."
Jeez I'm tired. And I've had a couple drinks. Kali and Amanda were drinking (apparently Paul wussed out. Dude, between this and the paltry amount it took to get you buzzing at the wedding, i'm beginning to question how Irish you really are. Poser.)
Hee hee- I made paul dance with a hot chick. There were 2 hot sisters at the reception, so I grabbed paul, walked us over to them, asked one to dance, and swept her off to the dance floor, effectively forcing paul to ask the other one to dance. See, I'm a good wingman. Not necessarily a NICE one, but a good wingman.
My last day of work was today (yesterday, technically, since it's after midnight.) The saddest part is that I can probably go back yet again if I'm stuck for a job after thanksgiving. The place is probably gonna fall apart without me (again) which is really sad considering how little actual work even I did.
If not, I'm confident that my stellar work karma will somehow land me yet another job where I get paid far too much money proportionate to the amount of actual work I do. Get paid a lot to do nothing. It's a dillon family tradition! (At least with me and Em.)
Crap. I'm sniffling all over again. Stupid allergies. I've been sneezing my fool head off for the last 3 days (either that or I get some kind of sinus migraine), and the only thing that helps is uber-benadryl, but that renders me pretty much comatose. I've been sleepwalkign through this entire week. seriously, i can't remember what i did last night, except I know that wej called me after I'd gone to bed to tell me he met Edge at the bucs game (no, not the guy from U2. The cooler one, sorta.)
I am soooo rambling. I can't even remember why i started this entry in the first place, except that Bill hicks is a really long-winded guy (much as I love him) and i had some time on my hands.
Damn. 1300 tracks on the mp3 player now. the sad part is, most of them are gin blossoms and hank williams songs.
I bought a laptop. I was actually gonna do my next entry from the laptop as a special thing, but then I realized that A) no one reads this anymore anyway since I tend to go 3 weeks between entries, so it'd be irrelevant by the time someone saw this, and B) i still don't like typing on those little keyboards. see, i have really big hands, in case those of you who know me havne't noticed, and I also type at about 70 words a minute (whcih is why i have so many friggin' typos in any entry where i"m even moderately inebriated, which is roughly all of them), which gets really hard on a laptop keyboard. i start tripping over my own fingers.
so a big-ass hurricane hit the gulf coast, which sucks. A lot of people died, which sucks more. i'm not going to comment on the situation much because i cna't add more than the news coverage already has, except to note that you idiots (by which i mean anyone who didn't vote for Kerry, because a vote for anyone else is a wasted vote anyway) wanted W. to be your president for another 4 years, and now you'll note that his approval rating following the bang-up job he's done with emergency aid (and in such a timely fashion) is the lowest approval rating of any president in history. This is the leader you twits wanted, so there you go. Hope you're happy. And New Orleans mayor Ray Nagin is now my favorite active politician after his profanity laced on-air tirade about how slowly federal help was coming. Anyone who will actually tell the feds to get off their asses in those exact words, knowing that everyone in the country will hear it, is awesome.
Oh, and Michael Brown, the head of FEMA, is the biggest knob in world history. He was on CNN today claiming that FEMA was unaware of the situation at the convention center until yesterday. The reporter on CNN then pointed out that CNN has had footage of that same situation as early as Tuesday, asking Brown point-blank "How is it that we have better intelligence than you do?" Of course, Brown the Knob had no answer for that. Oh, and guess who put that idiot in charge of FEMA? The same idiot you morons put in charge of the country.
I can't really top that, so I'm gonna chill for now. It's bedtime anyway.
Ken
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