2003-01-24 - 9:16 p.m.
I've come to a decision. I like the world I live in. No, really, I do. I may rail and rage against it until it feels like something's going to explode, but it's really all right right.
Well, let my qualify. I like the world I live in right now. People are changing and evolving all around me, and people drift into and out of my life, but for the first time things are finally starting to make sense to me.
Yesterday I watched a black man join the Ku Klux Klan just for the hell of it, and as a way of telling them to go fuck themselves. I loved every minute of it.
I was drinking about this incident earlier this evening (yes, you read that correctly) (hmmm...I wonder if I'll be accused of using too many parentheticals instead of too many ellipses...and I wonder which one I prefer.) Anyway, I concluded that I can only be happy in a situation that's more fucked up than I am, otherwise I've got nothing better to do than to point out the flaws in everything. Believe it or not, I need to feel like the conservative one in a given situation, or things start to get out of control for me. If everyone and everything else if fucked up, then I feel like maybe it's just me that should change, and self-loathing is one thing I can deal with pretty well by now.
(By the way, did you know that the Klan has a gift shop? They had the most offensive thing I've ever seen in my life. A t-shirt that shows four klansboys and a burning cross, with the text reading, "The Original Boyz in the Hood.")
I really can't wait to see a guy wearing that shirt out on the streets one day, so I can beat the holy living fuck out of him and get away with it (Cause the judge, upon seeing the t-shirt, would rule that the guy was asking for it and order the bailiff to kick his ass again.)
But, Plugs-
Meanwhile, Warren talks about what assholes most people who own cars are. I can empathize completely, because I can't stand cars. (I've never had a drivers license because I hate driving) He then gets into what assholes some computer owners are. I'll agree with that even after I get my own computer. he forgot about cel phone users, though.
Meanwhile, Viola tells us about her weekend. Neither of them actually gives any sort of explanation for why they're not here right now, when I'm at my drunken wittiest, but c'est la phrase only pretentious wanna-be French assholes use. (And how pathetic is your life if you wish you were French? French people are all smelly assclowns who never change their underwear. Don't wish to be French. Go buy a hooker or something.)
Mmmm...hookers.
Well, that's enough for now. I think I'll just leave you with a Hank Williams to end the evening, with a title matching this evening's entry, even though neither has anything to do with the pablum that just spewed for from my keyboard. Why do I pretend to get so introspective at large events?
Ken
Someday you'll call my name
And I won't answer
Someday you'll reach for me
I won't be there.
For you've grown tired
of all the love I gave you.
But someday you'll wish
That I still cared.
All these years
How I've loved you.
Still I know
I'll claim you for my own.
Someday you'll call my name
And I won't answer.
For someday you'll find
Yourself alone.
When your hair has turned
From gold to silver
And your eyes are dimmed
By passing years.
You'll remember darlin'
What I told you
There'll be no one then
To dry your tears.
There'll come a time
In your life, dear,
When you'll need
Someone who will care.
Someday you'll call my name
And I won't answer
For someday you'll find
That I'm not there.
�
