2007-08-23 - 9:54 p.m.
Folks have asked to hear the story behind my status thing, so here goes-
Last night Paul and Brook and I went out doing stuff, and we had dinner at the Red Robin near Southridge Mall. Paul put the meal on his debit card and we all gave him cash and exited to go the mall itself cause Paul wanted to get a new phone.
As Paul's in the middle of figuring out all his stuff, cause he's switching companies and numbers and blah blah blah, he realizes he left his debit card in the little billfold thing the waitress brings to you with your card and receipt for you to sign and the little note with the smiley face that's a last attempt to wrangle a slightly bigger tip from you (Didn't work in her case, or did it, paul?)
So anyway, Paul goes, "Did anyone get my debit card from the thing?" like we're the ones in charge of his card for him. Being the nice guys we are, Brook and I offered to run back to the restaurant and grab it for him while he finished the rest of his phone stuff.
Brook drives, and waits with the car running while i hurry in to grab the card.
The waitress has handed it off to her manager, who regards me with suspicions when I inform her that no, I am not Paul, in fact, but just someone with his best interests and well being at heart. She is hesitant to release the card into the custody of someone who isn't the person named on the card, naturally, in case I am a stranger who decides to abuse it. (Nevermind the fact that I am, in fact, someone who knows paul who would not hesitate to abuse it and laugh the whole time, cause it's funny to take advantage of paul.)
It took my best smile and every ounce of charming the pants off the woman that I have, along with a healthy amount of verification from our waitress, who remembered that the two ugly Irish guys sat together and joked how irresponsible levels of drinking were expected from their cultural heritage and that the one with the nice hair might not have been gay cause he kept smiling at me but it was kinda creepy and not charming and anyway, the two of them were in together and so the actual owner of the card can't be too far away and is 99% likely to get it if it's given to this guy who keeps seeming like he's trying to get anyone in this room to flirt with him, (actually, I think it was more the waitress' testimony on my behalf that did it, over any level of charm or cuteness i possess, but i just like to tell it my way to make it seem like i can still get a girl to respond when I need to. yup, the old man's still got it, and damn this is a long sentence) to convince her to give it to me.
So there we go. I had to apologize profusely, to a woman, for not being Paul. Hell has officially frozen over.
Wej- "It was nice knowing you. Kill yourself."
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