2006-05-17 - 7:11 p.m.
OMG LOL!!!! Like, the craziest thing just happened to mE! i was at th bustop and some guy was all, "dude, can u spare a quarter?" and i was like "dude, i don't have a quarter" and he's all "well, f*** u man! u juzt tink yer so special and l337 cause u got a job and all!!?!?!?!" and i'm all sorry bro. like, totally, dude's gotta understand. i uze a BUS PASS!!! LOL!!! What the F would i need a freakin' quarter for? LOL!!!!
so then i got towork and therewa s this totally smokin' babe there from like, czhechokasolavakia the chek repulik france or something like that and jesse was totally hitting on her but he's supposed to be hookin up w/sandy and then tracey told sandy and she was all "WTF!?!?! and i'm all "dude, U got BUS-TED!!!!" it was hilarious, LOL.
so now jesse's mad cause he's not gonna be gettin ne from ne1 2nite but he, like, totaly deserves it cause he thinks hes such a playa all the time and he wears way too much gel in his hair neway. like, gross. when he sweats it starts dripping all down his forehead and i'm like, dude, u, totally need to moistureize, knowwaht ah'm sayin'?
and then tracey was all, it's like ms. lonelee heartz around here nowadayz every1's all single all da time now and diana's like, totally i'm single and so is sandy so is ken so are u so is mike so is meghan we should all go to a singlez bar together dude. they're so crazee there i just cant all the shizzle that they keep sayin.
well, i gotta go now cuz idol is on and if i miss it im gonna be mean like simon all day tomorrow.
Current Mood- Perky.
Current Music- Shitty Pop Song by No Talent Hacks
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Dear diary-
my life is a festering pit of hopeless despair. girls never seem to like me, no matter how much nailpolish i'm willing to wear. no one understands me. they all just think i'm some clown they can laugh at and no one gets that the real me is suffering underneath. i feel like i'm falling into a deep dark hole and the only way out is to just keep going deeper into the darkness until it overtakes my very soul and encompasses me completely like a pair of fishnets. which look great on me by the way. last night i wrote more of my poetry and cried myself to sleep and dreamed those same dreams where i'm dressed in women's clothing and everyone is laughing at me, even my mom, and i'm standing there crying and tryig to get everyoen to understand that i just want them to accept me but they just keep calling me a freak and giggling. the mundanes can be so judgemental. i'd never show any of my poems to anyone though cause they'd just laugh and stomp all over my soul like everyone winds up doing anyway. this one was about vampires again, though, just in case you were curious. if anyone wants to read any of it, let me know and i'll sendyou some. i was thinking of writing some for this one girl just to prove to her i'm not gay, i'm just goth. or emo. i can't tell them apart anymore. i just know i seem to be allergic to sunlight and girls don't seem to want to talk to me. god, i'm so depressed.
Current Mood- Hopeless
Current Music- Angsty Crap by People Who Are Too Rich To Really Be That Depressed
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So, this morning I woke up to go to work and i realized that Garfield is totally right. I hate mondays. Except today was Wednesday. I hate Wednesdays too. If only we could just make every day saturday, right? :) When I went to take a shower, there was still some hot water left, though, which was nice. today i decided to wear my long white shorts cause i thought it was going to be nice and sunny today and boy was i wrong! but that comes later. then i had breakfast (corn chex for a nice change of pace over the usual rice chex. yummy) and then i took the usual bus to work. When i got to work there was a tour group already there because we had an early one scheduled (lucky thing i was able to get there on time) and i was supposed to follow Dick while he took a big group out and then Bob was going to take the rest of them. then i noticed bob wasn't here yet and I asked meghan about it. She said i might have to take the group out while she followed dick, but then luckily bob showed up at the last minute. That bob! He's such a character! so then i followed dick out on the tour. After we got back i put away all the microphones and glasses and stuff because i was feeling pretty nice today and there weren't any other groups waiting to go out. So then i helped sandy in the retail store. we folded t-shirts to refill the tower. after that i had lunch and took a small group out myself, but it was almost a big group. a bunch of people showed up right as i was about to start my tour and they were about to have their group just join mine until michelle realized that would put me over the maximum of 8 that i could take out. Rules are rules people! ;-) so they had to wait, but it was ok because they got to take a tour anyway. After that one was done i went home because it was so slow. On the bus ride home i read the paper. Well, to be honest, i just read the comics section. Oh, and Dear Abby. she had a really interesting letter from a woman who didn't know how to tell her husband that he was always telling boring stories about trivial things about his life that weren't important and he was just boring all their friends. Dear Abby is so nice! I'd like to meet her one day.
Well, i should go. I'm going to make myself some grub (yummy steak, but i gotta cut the fat off so it's less bad for me. Gotta watch my girlish figure! :) and then i'm going to read some more, or maybe watch some tv. One never knows with me! :)
Current Mood- Desperately trying to make my life seem interesting. Sign my comment book, please!
Current Music- NO ONE GIVES A DAMN by ABOUT ALL THE STUPID DETAILS OF YOUR BORING LIFE
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Greetings peons-
No doubt my extended absence has left you wondering why I didn't deign to grace you with my presence in these virtual pages before now. No doubt my absence has caused you a great deal of consternation. Rest assured that my personage is doing exceedingly well. I had merely lost myself these last few weeks in many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore. I have recently discovered a cache of literature that absolutely enraptured me and left me with an insatiable need to devour it all at once like some common glutton at a Ponderosa Steakhouse. Not that you would ever catch me eating there. I'm far too much of a sophisticate for that sort of mundane faire. I choose instead to dine on the finer things in life, preferably accompanied by the gentle strains of a concerto by Debussy, though I am one who delights in all manifestations of the terpsichorean muse. Of late I have been pleasuring my auditory canals with the charmingly melodic music of The Nobodies, whose latest album "I May Be Making The Name of This Band Up." is truly a welcome reminder that pop culture formulae has not completely devoured the audio world. Shame on you all if you haven't listened to it yet, but I guess that is to be expected in a world with such low expectations as this one seems to expect. All of this is a product of a vast right-wing anti-intellectual conspiracy perpetrated by those who really rule the world, and if you had ever read anything by Louf, Benard, Ditko, or Caravello, you too would know exactly what I mean. Alas, you haven't, and I must continue to drift through this world, a giant among mental midgets. Perhaps a trip to the theatre will assuage my loneliness. Adieu.
Current Mood- Un-be-fucking-lievably pretentious.
Current Music- "If you haven't heard of us, there must be something wrong with you" by Or Maybe It's Because We're Not Actually Any Good.
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WHAT'S UP, FUCKSTICKS?!?!?! Back again after yet another lengthy absence, but don't let that distress you, little shaver! Know why? Because I am still The Man, and I am still ehre to entertain YOU throujh the medium of foul language, angry ranting, and small penis humor! And i am still HUGE!!! (well, except down there! HA! THE WIT!!! THE WIT IS BACK!!! BASK IN MY GLORY, FUCKERS! I AM CHRIS HYATTE KEN DILLON AND I STILL RULE YOU ALL!!!!!)))
Man, I am just RAILING against the current administration lately. I am so pissed off i could just swear, except we all know that I would never use language like that, right? Fuck no! I wish that someone would just go ahead and impeach the motherfucker already so that we can move on. geez! Jon stewart is a god. he said the funniest thing about Bush the other night, but I can't remember what it is. Rest assured though, that when i do, i'm gonna so recycle it like it was my own joke anyway! And will you be able to tellt he difference? NAH! you'll just giggle away like a group of fucking schoolgirls and talk about how funny i am! that's because I OWN YOU, BITCHES!!! I am Ike and you are Tina!!!!! (geez, i was getting worried. it's been 5 WHOLE MINUTES since I used that joke and I havne't used a parenthetical in this paragraph yet...or an ellipse, for that matter. Dude, i not only managed the two-fer, i got the three-fer! Damn I'm good at this! Mu8st be the 3 months between entrties that gives me the time i need to finely hone my craft into masterpieces such as this! Bow down before CHRIS HYATTE Ken Dillon!!!!)
So yeah i was gone for awhile but that's because i was busy playing Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind a lot, which is possibly the greatest video game ever created (though to hear me talk, any game that catches my interest is the greatest video game ever) and the fact that I've spent every waking moment playing that damn game does NOT make me a dork. I have asserted repeatedly that I am far cooler thanyour average dork because a girl once gave me a tongue kiss her phone number wink and a smile second glance when i was in college, and everyone knows that NO OTHER DORKS in the history of Dorkness have ever so much as made eye contact with a woman, so therefore I am superior and you are all bitches. I am way too cool for all of this shit anyway, even though i keep coming back here in desperate need of attention. Feed my ego because I demand it! and because I am your superior! and because i'll cry myself to sleep unless you acknowledge my greatness, because I am an artist, dammit!
But i'm not one of those lame ass Black Beret Massive Tool artists that you always see. NO, I am 100% grounded without a trace of my ego ever getting the better of me. I hate every other actor i've worked with in the last 3 years (with the exception of Justin and Heather and Marcee) becuase there's something wrong with all of them, and don't you forget it! Bitches!
I am CHRIS HYATTE Ken Dillon, and I will destroy you all!
Current Mood- Also Un-be-fucking-lievably pretentious, only in a more vulgar way.
Current Music- Some depressing song by Hank Williams, most likely.
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Blogs suck, unless they're mine.
Well, even then....
Ken
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